Ok. I've been trying to post a new update lately but my life seems a little too busy. Like today, few minutes ago actually, I just layed on a sofa and I realized "jeez this is something I haven't done for a LOOONG time!".
But now I'm here, rolling in my bed, drinking my strawberry tea and typing... finally!
Well... I had tons of ideas during the week. I mean always when something nice, sad, depressing, awesome or just random happens to me, I just think "ok I need to write about this."
But I'm not.
I got my idea today.
I wanted tody to be my "I am not doing anything today" day. I mean... I thought about coming back from school around 4 and just chilling in my bed, watching Felicity, eating something super unhealthy and yummi. But my life doesn't really follows the plan.
I ended up joining English club at Bishop, having hot pear juice, working on Invisible Children event and shopping with Tyna and hanging out a little with Nikol.
Well... haning out with Nikol was the plan.
It all turned to be a little different.
After we finished our shopping with Tyna and drank our favourite yoghurt coffee I decided to walk her to the bus stop and then go to the meeting with my friend Nikol. But Tyna's bus just left while we were coming so we had to wait for the next one. And then it happened.
I saw a lots of kids walking down the boulevard with lanterns in their small hands all lost in their huge gloves wearing their tiny teeny beetle costumes. And man... I loved it.
But it made me feel so sad. I mean really sad.
I remembered when I was a kid living in that little village in the mountaines where we used to do things like that. When my mom would read me "Little Beatles" book and my sister would teach me everything about those magical beatles and we would just take a long walks in the evening, trying to see them and their little lanterns serving people and serving Lord.
And that was the feeling that sometimes shows up inside of my mind and my body... that feeling when I feel really blue and my body just doesn't really work and I just wish to be at home with my mum and my sisters, drinking my mum's hot coco and feeling safe.
Cause this is something I've missed too bad lately. After all that happened in my relationship, after all that happened with my knee, with my family, with school...
I just really need to feel safe.
If Tyna wasn't with me I would probably cry. I had to reschedule the meeting. I had to go home. I had to hug my little sister and tell her how much i love her and talk to my mom about those little beatles and drink a huge mug of hot coco and eat my mom's apple pie and doodle pirates and robots and flowers with my sister and read her a bed time story and kiss and hug her again... while we were painting I brought us two little bottles of an aloe vera drink and we cheered and painted againg when she just said...
"Hey you know what? We need to do this every day. Every day this time we will just cheer and have a little talk, ok sister?"
She smiled and I could see all her deciduous teeth and those funny spaces among them.
And in that exact moment I realized how lucky I am.
Even though I've been complaining a lot lately. About school, about my no chance to go to APU, about God not being any helpful in that "my future" question, about being hungry, about eating too much, about being too busy, about being super bored at school and blah blah blah. Please do NOT listen to me when I act like that. Just tell me
"You know what DUMB? Get some hot coco!".
Thank you!
Last week in points:
thursday - crazy. crazy crazy crazy. and busy. travelling through the whole city when there's no tram going as it should go. dealing with all those magisterial problems. work. rain. seeing people I didn't want to see. seeing my father who made me as angry, depressed and dissappointed as alway. paying my bills on time [for the first time]. having nice evening chocolate and wine conversation with my mum.
friday - getting those developed pictures I never wanted to develop. buying my favourite wtermelon water to calm down. chilling at Renky's, having fun. shopping with Renky, buying some really cool stuff and having a looots of FUN!!! watching that baseball movie. you know... it was a baseball movie haha. having fun with Renky the whole afternoon and evening.
saturday - library in the morning, feeling very inspired, reading the whole book, making chocolate pretzels with B., drinking mead and reading again.
sunday - baseball game. cool!!! even though we lost the game, we had so much fun. especially thanks to the "french" reporter haha. it was awesome!!!
monday - amazing, I mean AMAZING seminary about North Korea!!! I need to post special blog about that. and bible study with Kevin. which was partly sad, but very honest and helpful. Thank you!!!
yesterday - bible study at Ashley's. Yes I got into a little Juno-ish shape after eating all that salad, pasta, bagettes and brownies. YAAAY! and yes I think the Bread&Fish party at Jesus' ROCKS!!! [especially those 12 Jesus' bros and 5000 random dudes haha].
Thank you Ashley and Luke for being the best cooks
and the best tuesday evenings bible study leaders.
love, petra.
But now I'm here, rolling in my bed, drinking my strawberry tea and typing... finally!
Well... I had tons of ideas during the week. I mean always when something nice, sad, depressing, awesome or just random happens to me, I just think "ok I need to write about this."
But I'm not.
I got my idea today.
I wanted tody to be my "I am not doing anything today" day. I mean... I thought about coming back from school around 4 and just chilling in my bed, watching Felicity, eating something super unhealthy and yummi. But my life doesn't really follows the plan.
I ended up joining English club at Bishop, having hot pear juice, working on Invisible Children event and shopping with Tyna and hanging out a little with Nikol.
Well... haning out with Nikol was the plan.
It all turned to be a little different.
After we finished our shopping with Tyna and drank our favourite yoghurt coffee I decided to walk her to the bus stop and then go to the meeting with my friend Nikol. But Tyna's bus just left while we were coming so we had to wait for the next one. And then it happened.
I saw a lots of kids walking down the boulevard with lanterns in their small hands all lost in their huge gloves wearing their tiny teeny beetle costumes. And man... I loved it.
But it made me feel so sad. I mean really sad.
I remembered when I was a kid living in that little village in the mountaines where we used to do things like that. When my mom would read me "Little Beatles" book and my sister would teach me everything about those magical beatles and we would just take a long walks in the evening, trying to see them and their little lanterns serving people and serving Lord.
And that was the feeling that sometimes shows up inside of my mind and my body... that feeling when I feel really blue and my body just doesn't really work and I just wish to be at home with my mum and my sisters, drinking my mum's hot coco and feeling safe.
Cause this is something I've missed too bad lately. After all that happened in my relationship, after all that happened with my knee, with my family, with school...
I just really need to feel safe.
If Tyna wasn't with me I would probably cry. I had to reschedule the meeting. I had to go home. I had to hug my little sister and tell her how much i love her and talk to my mom about those little beatles and drink a huge mug of hot coco and eat my mom's apple pie and doodle pirates and robots and flowers with my sister and read her a bed time story and kiss and hug her again... while we were painting I brought us two little bottles of an aloe vera drink and we cheered and painted againg when she just said...
"Hey you know what? We need to do this every day. Every day this time we will just cheer and have a little talk, ok sister?"
She smiled and I could see all her deciduous teeth and those funny spaces among them.
And in that exact moment I realized how lucky I am.
Even though I've been complaining a lot lately. About school, about my no chance to go to APU, about God not being any helpful in that "my future" question, about being hungry, about eating too much, about being too busy, about being super bored at school and blah blah blah. Please do NOT listen to me when I act like that. Just tell me
"You know what DUMB? Get some hot coco!".
Thank you!
Last week in points:
thursday - crazy. crazy crazy crazy. and busy. travelling through the whole city when there's no tram going as it should go. dealing with all those magisterial problems. work. rain. seeing people I didn't want to see. seeing my father who made me as angry, depressed and dissappointed as alway. paying my bills on time [for the first time]. having nice evening chocolate and wine conversation with my mum.
friday - getting those developed pictures I never wanted to develop. buying my favourite wtermelon water to calm down. chilling at Renky's, having fun. shopping with Renky, buying some really cool stuff and having a looots of FUN!!! watching that baseball movie. you know... it was a baseball movie haha. having fun with Renky the whole afternoon and evening.
saturday - library in the morning, feeling very inspired, reading the whole book, making chocolate pretzels with B., drinking mead and reading again.
sunday - baseball game. cool!!! even though we lost the game, we had so much fun. especially thanks to the "french" reporter haha. it was awesome!!!
monday - amazing, I mean AMAZING seminary about North Korea!!! I need to post special blog about that. and bible study with Kevin. which was partly sad, but very honest and helpful. Thank you!!!
yesterday - bible study at Ashley's. Yes I got into a little Juno-ish shape after eating all that salad, pasta, bagettes and brownies. YAAAY! and yes I think the Bread&Fish party at Jesus' ROCKS!!! [especially those 12 Jesus' bros and 5000 random dudes haha].
Thank you Ashley and Luke for being the best cooks
and the best tuesday evenings bible study leaders.
love, petra.
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